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Hello Sexlinien Since december 2024 i have been struggling with my physical and mental health, to a point where i was seeking help through different forms of therapy. I started seeing a body sds therapist with hope to get better. I opened up from the first session and exposed my vulnerabilities and developed trust into that person. During the session i felt safe and i felt seen. The therapist comforted me and made me feel relaxed. Although he touched intimate parts of my body, i trusted him and assumed it was professional. He then mentioned that i have quite some tensions all around my body, especially in my intimate areas and i have blockages. He tried to build a connection by insinuating that I have these deep desires and so does he, and he understands me and my body. I asked him if he was also working professionally with sexual blockages and he said yes he has been working with that for many years and he could help me. Later i received a message stating that he could help me as a private person, however when i said i would prefer to keep it in a professional setting, he said thats ok as long as i am aware of what i am doing. So during a following session he helped me feel pleasure. At the moment it was fine, however now, in retrospect, i notice how i might have been ‘groomed’ from the first session, to feel the desire of exploring something with him. I am not sure if I have been manipulated into a sexual act, and I do not know what to do and how to feel. I know that i do not want any further contact with that person and i feel ashamed. I tried to see him after that again for my physical health, but it felt very sexual and off, and he was pushing my limits. It was all very creepy in the end, and i stopped the contact after 5/6 sessions. I dont know what to do, as I fear it might have been also my own choice to have given in. However I was vulnerable and depressed, and it seemed like it could be a way for me to heal. The question now is what will you recommend me to do?

Svar:

Hi there, and thank you for your message.

That sounds like an extremely transgressive experience, and it’s good that you’re reaching out. What you’re describing could indeed sound like grooming, and the feelings that you’re left with, such as confusion and shame, are unfortunately very symptomatic of someone who has experienced sexual exploitation.

When you’re in a therapeutic relationship, there is a natural imbalance of power and authority, and it is the absolute responsibility of the therapist to keep that relation professional, and to not exploit that imbalance. Not only is it unprofessional of the therapist, it is also potentially illegal. It is possible, that it would fall under the paragraph about exploiting someone’s dependency, vulnerability and need for care.

You say, that you are feeling unsure about whether it was your own choice to give in to the sexual acts with him. It is understandable that you can sit with that doubt. You might have felt like consenting in the moment, and in some instances intimate touch from a body therapist can be unproblematic, but there are several factors that point towards this being a situation where you’ve been a victim of manipulation.
There are some body therapists that offer intimate touch to help release tension in the muscles of that area, however it is not with the focus of that touch being sexual in nature, and in that case the client would have made a specific agreement with the therapist beforehand about that type of touch being part of the treatment.
You sought out a body therapist to help you treat your struggles with mental and physical health. He was the one introducing the idea of stimulating you sexually, after you had made yourself vulnerable to him. You also tell us, that he even suggested moving the relation from a professional to a personal one. These are all highly unethical acts from a therapist, and could indeed be manipulation of you by a person in power. Being manipulated into agreeing to sexual acts does not count as freely given enthusiastic consent.

So what do you do from here on? There are several options.

- First, we would highly urge you to contact Offerrådgivningen (Victim Support), where you can find support and council for victims of crimes. It’s anonymous, and their phone lines are open 24/7. You can reach them on 116 006. They also have a chat function which is open Monday – Wednesday from 14.30-17.00 and Thursday – Sunday from 18.30-21.00. They will be able to better guide you in terms of your legal and therapeutic options.

- We would also like to incourage you to report your experience to the Danish police. They can be contacted by phone on 114, by going to your nearest police station, or through their website. Here you can also read about the process of reporting a crime.

- Body SDS have their own ethical guidelines. You might consider contacting them to report the therapist. You can find all of their contact info here.
We hope you are able to use our response, and wish you the best of luck. You are also welcome to contact us by chat or phone 70202266 Monday-Friday from 15:00 to 19:00.
Best regards, Sexlinien

xx143